Adventures Of A Wedding Photographer

Disclaimer: Any photographs displayed are not representative of any of the ‘stories’

They’re simply for illustrative purposes…

Mother of the bride “Make me look beautiful”

Me “It’s a camera not a wand” 😂😂😂

Bride (4’6” about 15st – 210 lbs) “You’ve made me look fat”

I’ve not been your dietician for the past 30 years!

Guest “Have you photographed weddings before?”

“No I usually work for the local morgue photographing cadavers, but it’s my day off today…”

“What side does the Grooms family sit on?”

“Whatever the Bride says…”

Was once photographing a wedding in Liverpool when the Bride and her mother started arguing about her choice of groom. They’d been together 12 years and had two children! It came to fisticuffs. I left….

Plenty of more tales for another day…

I faked it as a ‘Wedding Photographer’ for 20 years!

Back in about 1992 I worked for Kellogg’s in Manchester. I was ‘into’ photography but not in any professional capacity. A colleague wanted a print of Ashness Bridge I’d taken on a Canon EOS1000FN.

Another colleague saw it on my desk as I was about to ‘deliver it’…

And said “That’s fantastic! Would you photograph my wedding!”

A few gulps later I said yes, but, I haven’t a clue what I’m doing…

So…photographed the wedding and learned very very quickly…

You don’t need to be an artist (although it may help)

You need to understand the emotional hot spots…that’s the key…

So…even though I attended many seminars by the likes of Yervant and Nigel Harper I just did my thing…

I did the very best I could. Was never complacent and only had one complaint in twenty years. A bride said I made her look fat…well, it’s a camera not a wand. And if you’ve lived on pies for twenty years there’s only so much photoshop can do…

And here’s the dichotomy – every wedding is unique…and the same. The emotional hot spots are easy to predict – Bride getting out of car – groom seeing Bride for the first time – the exchanging of rings – the first kiss etc.

And I’ll probably never shoot a wedding ever again…I’m not that interested, I’m old and can do without the hassle…however never say never…